a fond farewell

thanks kelley to the fabulous link you sent me (http://curiousbird.typepad.com/curious_bird/) because as i was browsing... i found this post: "it happened. I never know from year to year when it's going to happen but today was the day. while riding my bike to meet up with one of my favorite ladies, I smelled fall in the air. it was most definitely the smell of fall. that crispness was there, and with it came my usual excitement about the approaching possibility of wearing an extra layer in the evenings. it made me grin as I rode. what a pleasant surprise it was. it always is. " that made me smile so big. it felt like someone else shared my mind and feelings. I love it love love love love it.

the crispness of fall really is slowly moving in. it's crazy and wonderful and makes me feel a little bit better about everything.

i'm angry and bitter though, i don't want to leave some things i just dontttttttt want to live weeks without it. oh well.

here i am

i really feel on the edge of everything, but i haaaaaaaate being rushed. ever. with anything i don't like when someone is pushing me telling me to move faster and get everything done double time. let me be let me see what i want to see and feel what i want to feel and move at my own pace.

i guess this is just me pushing myself. i guess i have all the time in the world and i'm pointing fingers at empty walls. so sorry... maybe i'm the one that needs to slow down and enjoy the scenery of this transformation.

ahhhhhhhhhh. that feels better. much!!!

but i'm going to miss you so much.

my heart and i have become such close friends, i mean i've had to really help it out a lot, keep it going.

lie with me for a while and we can close our eyes

i know it's all strange

crooked

and deranged..

but maybe our honeymoon in space wouldn't be a bad thing

i mean you're my best friend after all

i was told not to say goodbye

so..

see ya later :)